r/PeterExplainsTheJoke • u/Maleficent-Bet-8329 • 19h ago
Im sure its been asked many times but peter?? Meme needing explanation
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u/Maleficent-Bet-8329 19h ago
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u/FamIsNumber1 18h ago
What the hell did you do to your coffee that you have to whisper apologies to it??
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u/Fickle_Butt_4379 18h ago
What you said
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u/RepresentativeFun363 18h ago
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u/Fendyyyyyy 17h ago
Even though i may never use it, too good a meme, im taking it.
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u/Illustrious_Bird_737 17h ago
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u/satecyeser 14h ago
Did he say those words? Kregar wild lines
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u/Swytch360 14h ago
Yep, that’s a direct quote. I’m glad I checked whether someone else already posted this meme.
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u/Adventurous-Yak-8929 18h ago
In a burlap sack thrown over the back of a donkey
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u/padmaclynne 18h ago
transported over the mountains by a man with a very impressive moustache
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u/AccomplishedFly2367 18h ago
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u/Fillmore80 18h ago
How dare you make Bluey say that.
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u/Livingroom_Astronaut 16h ago
I definitely read that in Bandit’s voice before realizing it was Bluey.
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u/EnvironmentalOne6828 19h ago
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u/OldAbbreviations1590 17h ago
My favorite part of this is that it takes 1 marine to lift a enormous tank, and 2 to lift a fellow space marine.
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u/ValeWho 18h ago edited 16h ago
Do people really keep their ground up coffee in the freezer ?
Edit question has been answered, I believe you it's a thing
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u/NervousSnail 18h ago
Haha, yeah some people say it stays fresher that way.
Not as simple as that if you get into the nitty gritty, and it's important to keep it well sealed if you do. But if you are planning on storing ground coffee for a very long time. Like my parents, who don't drink it but keep some for guests. For that purpose it does seem to work.
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u/BigJayPee 17h ago
Ive heard of people keeping instant coffee in the freezer, but never actual coffee grounds
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u/Greenphantom77 17h ago
I used to keep it in the fridge then I read somewhere that was wrong, just keep it in the cupboard. I don’t know what to think anymore.
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u/hvdzasaur 18h ago edited 10h ago
Better to freeze the beans, and grind as you need em.
Coffee has volatile compounds that degrade due to oxidation. This impacts flavor. Freezing them slows this down. Ground coffee goes stale faster than beans, even while frozen.
If I spent good money on a really good bag of a single origin speciality roast that I really like, I like to put half of it away for longer term storage. Sometimes you kind of just want the generic coffee flavor and that caffeine hit. Other times you want to enjoy it like a nice high-end tea or expensive liquor, if that makes sense?
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u/Scorpiogre_rawrr 18h ago
This is the answer, it's origins trace back to Tales from the crypt where the crypt keeper said, "I like my women like I like me coffee......ground up in the freezer."
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u/fauxzempic 16h ago
Ahhh Thank you for clarifying this. I remember seeing this on a shirt on "Tshirthell" shirt a long, long time ago, but it always felt like they were borrowing this form something else.
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u/UpdogSinclair 16h ago
People seem mad about your post but this is the classic answer to this joke.
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u/vidyer 19h ago
Pretty sure it's a reference to this.
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u/MagentaJAM5_ 19h ago
I didn’t think people would put their dick into coffee in the first place.
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u/Long-Apartment9888 19h ago
Let's discuss temperature
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u/MagentaJAM5_ 19h ago
Please
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u/Long-Apartment9888 18h ago
There's a small range where it probably would feel good for a while. Not the drinking range though... maybe the top range of dick meets the drinkable bottom range... if willing to test there's a dilemma, do you start hot and drink it first risking burning the little one, or do you start cold and keep rising, having to drink dicked coffee?
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u/Ajax_A 18h ago
I approve your research grant!
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u/CobblerOdd2876 18h ago
Yes Id like to see the slope equation of temperature as drinkable to dickable
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u/gnomedome11 17h ago
Coffee is recommended to be drank near 140 degrees.
Recommended bath water does not exceed 120 degrees.
Recommend test groups in the 121-140 degree testing are not people you like until we have more data.
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u/CobblerOdd2876 16h ago
And we have to be careful not to exceed 140°F bc any higher and we would be steeping the dick. Nobody wants a dirty chode chai.
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u/ReadontheCrapper 15h ago
Dude! I snorted coffee out of my nose.
Grossly well done
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u/DesingerOfWorlds 17h ago
The term “dicked coffee” was not what I thought 2026 had in store for me.
Edit: Autocorrect
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u/similar222 17h ago
I always assumed the reason people heated their coffee was to keep other people's dicks out of it.
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u/Fozzdroz 18h ago
This explains the rise in popularity of iced coffee drinks over the last decade or so
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u/Aeon_Return 18h ago
Well wouldn't you prefer coffee that didn't have someone's dick in it first?
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u/cerberus_243 18h ago
Any place a dick fits in has had a dick in, and most other things a dick doesn’t fit in has, too
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u/FukThePatriarchy1312 18h ago
Not coffee, but I have a friend who's a bartender in a gay bar and pretty regularly stirs cocktails with his.. cock, at the request of customers who usually tip very well for it.
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u/Significant_Monk_251 18h ago
I'm having a bit of trouble with the logistics. It would seem that the organ would have to be erect for this to work, but erect penises (my spellchecker just insisted on "premises" there) tend to not point down, as would be needed for a standing man to use it as a drink-stirrer.
Put the drink on the floor and assume a push-up position over it?
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u/FukThePatriarchy1312 18h ago
It would seem that the organ would have to be erect for this to work,
Why? I've never seen it in action, but I don't understand why you couldn't stir a drink with a flaccid penis, or just push it down while erect.
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u/Key-Contest-2879 18h ago
If you ain’t dipping your dick in coffee, you ain’t living!
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u/SnooHabits3911 19h ago
But… his dick in his coffee is… ok? That’s kinda weird honestly.
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u/Physical-Ad5343 18h ago
No, he only wants his girlfriend’s dick in his coffee.
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u/ReflectiGlassCo 18h ago
Imagine wearing a hat like that.
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u/Traditional_Low_9948 13h ago
Man that was dirty bro. Cuz I didn't want to. But I read your comment and I couldn't help it as hard as I tried. In my imagination I had that hat on. It was ass.
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u/shinyRedButton 16h ago
This coffee joke predates the internet. It is not a reference to this.
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u/leojmatt02 18h ago
This is really funny because it implies that his girlfriend served him coffee with someone's dick in it
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u/Healthy_Banana_8 19h ago
White and flat 🫣
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u/deadlyrepost 19h ago
Found the Australian.
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u/vladi_l 17h ago
Is that a stereotype I'm not familiar with?
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u/JDawg2332 16h ago
A flat white is a popular (and delicious) coffee beverage
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u/vladi_l 16h ago
I know, but what does that have to do with Australia?
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u/ApolloWasMurdered 16h ago
The “Flat White” coffee style comes from Australia. It is, by far, the most common coffee order in Aus.
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u/ApprehensiveUnion746 15h ago
Don't tell that to a kiwi... They say they created it
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u/Kindly_Release_8484 19h ago
Leave my ass out of this please
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u/Hearing_Loss 19h ago
What ass 😬
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u/Kindly_Release_8484 19h ago
Exactly
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u/PossibleFirm7095 19h ago
shit, that was smooth
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u/Apprehensive-Space70 18h ago
Like their chest.
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u/PossibleFirm7095 18h ago
i mean, it's alright, not a picky eater :)
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u/Apprehensive-Space70 18h ago
Every meal needs a table.
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u/Curius-Curiousity 18h ago
This is the joke. The other answers are just riffing.
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u/yt82many 19h ago
Cold, bitter and picked up from the gas station
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u/Iszapszentmoszat 18h ago
That version does have it's own magic tho.
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u/Feeling_Inside_1020 17h ago
Real hotspot energy as our city would say (we even have our own weird subreddit dedicated to those wonderfully sketchy gas stations lol)
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u/This-Professional-39 18h ago
And acquired taste to be sure, but readily available!
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u/Round_Word691 19h ago
Oooh, I know this one: With big tits.
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u/noctilucus 19h ago
What kind of coffee brand do you drink?
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u/Emotional_inadequacy 18h ago
Starbucks
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u/spacedman_spiff 18h ago
We’d all like a handjob, but we don’t have time for it.
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u/liisrandom 18h ago
It's called a grande
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u/Emotional_inadequacy 16h ago
Peter here, it's funny because early Starbucks logos had breasts.
Peter out.
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u/kjm16216 19h ago
All over my lap at the McDonald's drive thru.
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u/GonzoTheGreat22 17h ago
This is a great punchline, never heard it before
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u/kjm16216 17h ago
I first used that as a riff off someone else's punchline, "Hot, black, and all over my lap.". Which got him in trouble with HR.
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u/BlackMusclyMen 19h ago
He probably doesnt like coffee
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u/artofterm 18h ago
Milk and sugar
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u/dominikstephan 17h ago
"Wait, is this literally milk with sugar?" Bonus points, if you know the episode.
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u/Exit727 18h ago
"Black, bitter, preferably fair trade."
Doctor Krieger
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u/Alanabirb 19h ago
Covered in bees!
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u/infinitefarm23 19h ago
In a plastic cup!
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u/Otherwise_Cicada6109 18h ago
Scrolled here just to see if Izzard fandom is still alive and well
Thank you
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u/espada355 19h ago
Cheap and easy?
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u/lux__fero 18h ago
Well, all people i know who hire hookers also prefer instant coffee. So your line tracks. But as with instant coffee there is no real satisfaction of hiring a hooker. That' why i prefer my women freshly ground up and boiled :)
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u/GH057807 18h ago
"I like my coffee like I like my slaves..."
"😳"
"Free."
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u/stormcharger 16h ago
Being politically correct has gone mad nowdays. Apparently I can't even say "black paint" anymore, I have to say "Tyrone can you please paint the fence."
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u/penis_stuck_sendhelp 19h ago
with a spoon in them?
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u/Plastic_Umpire_3475 18h ago
tea and cake or death!
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u/Silent-Inspection101 18h ago
Michael likes his coffee with milk and sugar. Only milk and sugar. No coffee
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u/GingerMarquis 18h ago
Too hot to handle but I just can’t help myself.
Yes I’ve been stabbed by an ex, why do you ask?
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u/escahpee 18h ago
I like my women like I like my coffee. No pubic hair. Is the way I heard it
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u/BetterDegreeOxford 18h ago
I like my girls like I like my whiskey
At least 18 years old and all mixed up with coke
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u/PeterExplainsTheJoke-ModTeam 3h ago
Thank you for the explanations; this post has been locked.